Dear Dad- Happy Birthday!

Dear Dad,

Happy 57th Birthday!  I know you are probably annoyed that I announced that, but I am proud of my stud Dad who is doing everything in his power to take care of himself & live a healthy life each & everyday.
A card doesn't nearly give me the space to tell you how much I love & appreciate you, but since you enjoy my blogging & I don't do it as often as I would like, I thought I would devote this moment to you.

  I have so many great memories with you...  

I remember when I was a little girl even though you had a traveling job with Wal-mart & traveled most Monday-Thursday, you still DID NOT MISS A BEAT.  You made up for every second of being gone & spent every single moment with us.  You were present at everything we did & made time to play with us.  We would enjoy playing store with your money & we would buy things from you in our own house.  You always would chase us & hide with us & cuddle us.  You colored with us, prayed with us & let us sleep in sleeping bags most nights on your floor.  I will never forget in those moments at night feeling so loved by you & Mom.

Then I grew into a young woman.  You, (& Mom),  put me into a christian school & taught me as much as you knew about God.  I didn't always want to listen, but I heard you.  From as far back as I can remember you always would say, "just take the high road".  It wasn't until I was an adult in my later 20's that I finally grasped a hold of what that truly meant.  You knew that someday it would make sense to me & all those times I didn't want to hear it paid off, because I did hear you & now try to pass that on to almost everyone I know.  I remember you driving home from work to take care of me one day when I was really sick because Mom couldn't get to me quick enough.  I remember you staying up late with me to work on Math, (my most horrible subject), & you would get so frustrated because you wanted me to understand, only because you cared.  I remember laughing about it after I would go to my room being thankful I had a Dad that wanted to see me succeed.  One of my most fondest memories which I think probably paid off the most was you saying "If you feel bad enough to skip church then you feel bad enough to stay home all day & not do anything".  There were so many morning as a teen I wanted to sleep in but because of your guidance I went to church & heard God's word, even some day's when you thought I wasn't listening.  It was you & Mom that pushed me to find God.  

It was almost time for me to move on with my life & move out & Chad proposed to me.  I remember you having a talk with us & making sure we knew that Christ was to be the center of our marriage & that we needed to be in church & get involved.  You were there when he proposed & you were there walking me down the aisle holding my hand easing my nerves because I think you were more stressed than me & I was scared you would pass out.  HA!  That in itself took my nerves away.  You had braces & I will never forget  thinking to myself that you waited all those years after you had put me through school & braces myself... to finally take care of you & Mom.  Blessed.  So deserved, Dad.

There were so many days in the beginning of my marriage that were hard, trying to learn to be a new wife having never lived with someone before.  I hardly knew what I was doing & I just remembered to "take the high road" & do my best.  I would remember things Mom would do for you & tried to be that exact wife to Chad.  I don't know if I will ever be what she is to you.  But I was taught from the best.

When I was delivering Avery you were there & the first one into the room.  You waited patiently in the other room as we called to let you know she arrived & Mom said there was a huge pause because you couldn't hardly catch your breath you were so chocked up.  You have loved her in a sense like you love me & when you play with her I can reflect on how you were as my Daddy, as her Poppy.  I remember a day in 2011 I came to your work in tears having a panic attack.  Motherhood was getting the best of me & the daily life struggles were hurting me.  I will never forget I approached you while you were outside helping a customer & you saw the look on my face & literally jumped over to me whisking me away to comfort me & catch my tears.  We sat for an hour on the steps talking about life & you completely took that pain away.  A moment I can never forget.

And then in July 2012 it was my turn.  

I will never forget the phone call that was possibly never meant to happen.  I still can't believe that my phone was on silent & I just so happened to pick it up & you were calling.  Not knowing at the time, but you were having a heart attack & you were home alone.   Rushing to your house these memories of my life were flashing through my head.  I still think back to that Saturday at 8:30 in the morning & there wasn't a single car on the road in my way to get to you. I couldn't bear the thought of losing someone so wonderful to me.

I will forever remember the month of September 2012.  We took care of you for 15 days straight in the hospital & I never wanted to leave your side.  Mom was your true angel.  Those days were so hard as I don't even know that some people even know how hard it was for our family.  You were so sick.  The night I was called to the hospital at 3 in the morning was a drive I will never forget.  My heart opened up for Christ in a way it never has before & my faith became stronger than anything in this world.  I know you may not realize this but because of what you taught me growing up, & through your heart tragedies I become that woman I finally needed to me in knowing Christ.  I realized what knowing God meant & found the true meaning of prayer.  I am thankful at the age of 30 that God gave me the time He did on earth to still be here & finally catch the truth of what life is about.   ...The day before your heart surgery I started a woman's bible study & met some amazing woman.  I am now on a James study that is showing me what God had been molding my life & heart for during your heart journey. Wow, God's timing.  Perfect.

Sometimes I wonder if people even can grasp why I am so close to you.  When someone leads your life in the direction you have helped lead mine, you are so thankful & have that bond in Christ. I have seen you love me through some of the ugliest moments yet you still loved me.  That is why my heart is so close to yours, & because a bonus, you are my Dad.

Without you Dad & the seeds you have planted in our lives, I would be nothing.  You have made it so crystal clear that we need to make our generation a better place & have pushed that on me to where I want so badly to be that for Avery & our future children to come.  I am so thankful God spared your life & gave you a new love for life & a renewed & healthy heart.  I praise Jesus daily for this.  

Your a special guy Dad.... you are a man of wisdom.  I love you.

Thank you Lord for another Birthday with Dad!

Happy Birthday!